If you’ve read my book The Intentional Networker™ you may recall Chapter 5. It’s all about saying a gracious, but firm ”no thank you” to anyone or anything that keeps you from what you really want. You know what I’m talking about here: the energy-drainers, the time-suckers, the boredom-inducers, the joy-robbers, the regret-makers, the resource-wasters, the fill-in-the-blankers for anything that makes you sad, less-than, tired, crazy, or unproductive.
Saying “no” can be a powerful and novel idea; especially if up until now you’ve operated in a state of compliance, cruised along in default mode, or forged ahead without any consideration as to what you want or how you truly want to live, work, and connect with others. (For the why’s and how’s of figuring that part out, go back and reread Chapter 1).
It can be a startling epiphany to realize you often have the power to refuse who or what is not right for you. At that point you can simply back away energetically and emotionally, which is often enough. Or you can be more assertive and say “no more.” Either way, it can be scary. Maybe even terrifying. But once you do it you are free to discover what’s new, different, and often better.
That’s where the next powerful and necessary step comes in: learning what your “yes’s” are and how and when you should use them.
Yes is positive, proactive, and powerful when combined with vision and intention. It invites possibilities. How great is that?
That said, have you made clear your “no’s” so you can look forward to attracting, recognizing, welcoming, and enjoying your “yes’s”? Whether this is about something as specific as networking or something as broad as experiencing each day, give it some thought. What could a few well-considered “yes’s” do for you?